Reflections

The other night, Sawyer woke up crying in his sleep. I usually let him work it out himself, but he didn't seem to want to calm down. So I quietly went into his room and picked him up. He settled right down and snuggled in. As I rocked with him in the darkness of his room, I started to contemplate on how blessed I have been to have the priviledge of holding FIVE sweet, sleeping babies in my arms. Yep, FIVE of them!

This got me thinking about each one of my children and how truly blessed we were to have five HEALTHY babies and to have them here with us still; to watch them learn and grow and mature.

As Sawyer is our last, I thought back on all the months of being sick with morning sickness (that only happened at night). Gaining 35 lbs with each one and not quite loosing it all in between each one. Hearing that first heart beat...five different times. Getting ultrasounds done and being surprised with the announcement of what gender each baby was at birth...NOT at the ultrasound.

This also brought back the scary memory of being told that baby #4 (Cardiff) had a choroid plexus cyst on the right side of his brain, found during a routine ultrasound. I remembered how terrified I was that something would be wrong with him. These particular cysts are often signs of genetic diseases like Down Syndrome or Trisomy 18 (which is always fatal). Again, I was calmed as I remember going to the Temple with Wayne and feeling comforted that I would be able to take care of and raise this baby and that things would be all right.

As soon as he was born, almost before the doctor could say "It's a BOY," I asked, "Is he okay? Does he look all right?" He was...he was perfect just like the others. What a blessing Cardiff is to us. And today, I took him to his first day of pre-school. He was so incredibly excited!

After rocking my last baby back to sleep, I put him back in bed and gave thanks for a home filled with joy, laughter (usually) and the smiling faces of Emmy, Azia, Parker, Cardiff and Sawyer. Oh, how I LOVE them!